Thursday, March 06, 2008


Me no write so good

J is a big fan of taking classes. We haven't actually taken any classes but she always wants to take a cooking class or a photography class. She's a visual learner and feels she needs to see what's going on before she can grasp the idea and then do it for herself. Since I'm a fan of always learning, I'm on board with these ideas.

We both need to read more. The 7 habits of highly successful people is dry and it feels like an assignment and I haven't read more than 80 pages or so. I still feel successful just not highly successful. It isn't pleasure reading and we both need more of that. Maybe I'll go see what Cynical Chris is reading or has read and try a couple out.

Neither J nor I have littered in years. Actually on our hike last week, we picked up other people's trash. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone did that? There would only be grass and trees and birds outside instead of McDonald's cups, wrappers and cigarette butts. This is obviously excluding landfills but we try and recycle as much as we can to try and keep some of our trash out of those too. We do it for Mother Nature and for you. When you're hiking or biking or driving or walking along wouldn't you rather enjoy nature and its majesty instead of being distracted by that Bud Light can? Or maybe it's just me. Maybe other people can ignore the trash and keep going, but I really can't. I see it and it reminds me that certain people are disgusting and they should be made to live in the filth they toss outdoors.

J's mom was up here a couple weeks ago and we both jumped on her when she threw a cigarette butt on the ground in the parking lot of the airport. I told her my theory that ultimately it will be the trash that smokers leave that gets smoking banned most everywhere, especially outdoors. Can you imagine not smoking in a national park? Well it's coming. Mark my word. They already have smoke-free beaches in Cali and I'm sure only part of the argument was the second-hand smoke blowing into people's faces. Those poor children making their sand castles and digging up cigarette butts. Someone finally thought of the children!

I really need to let Camel know about my theory. I still occasionally smoke because it's fun and cool. Sure I get winded walking up stairs the next day, but that goes away once my lungs heal. I got an email from them asking for me to stand up against a proposed increase in cigarette taxes in South Carolina. I laughed and deleted it. We have some of the lowest cigarette prices in the country and smokers should probably pay a bit more for their habit. Maybe it'll even get a few people to quit?

Camel has been my brand since undergrad. Caveman smoked Camel Lights and they weren't bad and then I had a Camel Special Light and was blown away. Then they kept coming up with different flavors and cool tins and cool designs on their packs. All those coupled with my fond images of Joe Cool, the coolest smoking camel around, and I almost exclusively smoke Camels. I have a friend who works for the OTHER big brand of cigarette, you know, they sponsor a certain red F1 team. Scuderia Ferrari Marlboro? Ring any bells? I'm actually impressed with them the most because they are a title sponsor of the team but can only have "Marlboro" on the race car for 3 out of 16 races. That's panache.

Which brings me to my original topic: getting high. Most people associate that term with mary jane but it fits for anything that gets your heart rate up and you enjoy and want to do again. There are ways to get high drug-free. Homer showed a couple when Moe wouldn't serve him. You can give blood or go up to an elevation where the air is thinner. I hear sky-diving, base jumping and most other extreme, sorry x-treme, sports are a great adrenaline rush. Don't like those ideas? Okay, then we'll move on to putting something into your body. Starbucks thinks caffeine is a great drug, in fact, why aren't you drinking a Pumpkin Spice Latte right now?!?!?! Others enjoy highly processed sugary foods and drinks. Some try over-the-counter pharmaceuticals. There are quite a few. I'll let you search Erowid for those. Still too tame. Now we're getting into the good stuff. Stuff that you either need a doctor's prescription or have to be of legal age to get your hands on. Cigarettes (nicotine!) and alcohol (beer!), hooray! Doctor's can get you lots of other drugs but you usually have to be pretty banged up to get those, so we'll stick with the two that the federal government thinks are safe enough to be distributed pretty much everywhere. Cigarettes make you stink and your lungs forgive you only if you stop for a long time. Alcohol also makes you stink and your liver will forgive you only if you drink in moderation (1-2 a day, whatever pansy liver, I wanna get drunk!)

That's it. Everything else is "bad" and cigarettes and alcohol are "good". Thanks government for thinking of our safety and health and only allowing these two drugs to be bought and sold openly.

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