Wednesday, March 21, 2007


Me fail English? That's unpossible!

-Ralph Wiggum, Simpsons episode "Lisa on Ice" from Season Six.

Watched that episode this morning over my schmugar (pronounced shmooger) toast, which is bread with butter and cinnamon-sugar on top. J stole all the cheese yesterday so she could have cheese and crackers with her lunch. We ran out of lunch meat yesterday so I swung by Bi-Lo and picked up a deli sub for today and tomorrow's lunch.

The BBC conducted a poll asking about what impact 12 countries had; negative, neutral or positive impact. Surprise, surprise, dear ol' Canada was #1 with 54% positive impact and 14% negative. See? I told you everyone loves Canada and a big reason why I keep considering moving there, not because I want to be liked but because even though it's America Jr., they're doing lots of things right in my mind.

Which brings up my international defense mechanism. If you are ever surrounded by a group of internationals in a foreign land and they ask if you're American, I am readily going to say "Hell no, eh! I'm from Canada! Want to play hockey? Have any gravy or white vinegar for my fries?" and then whip out my travel size Canadian flag. Yeah, I have no shame and a small amount of American pride, which is superceded by my desire to avoid a beating. If it is a less volatile situation, I will say that I am from America, have never voted for any Bush and list a few of the things that are wrong with our country. (Let me know if you would like those listed.)

So who was first? Those dirty Israelis. Yep, Israel came in first with 56%/17% negative/positive impact, followed by Iran with a 54%/18% negative/positive impact. America, Fuck Yeah! came in 3rd with a 51%/30% negative/positive (at least we're seen as helping by 30%) impact and Kim Jong Il's North Korea came in 4th a 48%/19% negative/positive impact. Here's a summary and here is the whole poll which breaks it down country by country. This page also has a link to the .pdf of the survey. Fine, it's right here.

Let's see here, who doesn't like us:

Nigeria, Kenya and the Phillipines think we're doing a great job. Thanks guys! Even higher than ourselves which ranked our own nation at 57% postive/28% negative. Germans, Greeks, Egyptians and Turks are really not too crazy about our government. But who is? Well, besides the half who voted for it and even some of them are opening their eyes.

I would also like to go ahead and tell both the Democratic and Republican parties that they can kiss my ass. I'll vote in the Dem primaries cuz that's what I'm registered as, but when Nov. '08 rolls around, I will vote however I damn please. Be it Libertarian, Green, even Dem or Rep. I refuse to vote by party lines and will be an informed voter who will educate myself and not be a one issue voter.

Wow, people like Japan too. J could pull off Japanese but I don't think I can. It also appears as though Egypt and Turkey don't really like anyone.

I talked to my friend Tom who is currently here. He said he's staying at a nice hostel which is a bit expensive but you get two beds (he has a traveling buddy) your own toilet and shower and a buffet style breakfast and dinner. Bonus! Ah, he also said that the country code is CH, which makes no sense, but thanks to wikipedia, I learned that it stands for Confederatio Helvetica (Latin). It seems like SZ would make more sense, but what do I know.

In other news, 1 in 5 adult Americans can't read and it's estimated that only 50% of Americans can read at a Level 3 proficiency. Ok, it refers to the ACT's reading levels with Level 3 being:
Students at Level 3 typically can comprehend prose of several paragraphs on subjects within a familiar framework and with a clear underlying structure, and they can understand some main ideas in limited occupational or academic materials.
Maybe I'll volunteer at a literacy center. Give back since I love reading. I promise that I won't give writing tips, just basic grammar and sentence structure. And I still want to try being an abortion clinic escort. Sloth's stories about it were so incredibly moving and sad.

In other abortion news, SC's stupid head governor supports a bill that would require any woman, even rape and incest victims, to receive an ultrasound before an abortion. Super, more people with penises making laws for people without them.

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