Thursday, February 08, 2007

 

Bacon that sausage boy!

Homer's response to Bart complaining that his heart hurts. I can relate. I just took on Fernow St. Cafe's "Triple Threat" Challenge. It's just a one-time thing to spice up everyone's week. It was supposed to happen last week but it got snowed out. Of course, after seeing the pics from Upstate NY where they got 6 feet of snow, school being cancelled for 1-3 inches seems a bit silly.

That's alotta snow.

But the challenge was to eat a triple decker burger with whatever toppings you want and a 22 oz. soda for $5.49. The burgers are 6 oz. (pre-cooked weight I assume but didn't have my pocket scales with me) and there are 3. My burger order went bottom bun, meat, cheese, bottom bun, meat, cheese, meat, mayo, mustard, lettuce, top bun. There will be pictures. The manager of Fernow was snapping pics like mad, so hopefully they'll be up somewhere. Since, as a human, my jaws are unable to unhinge themselves

(image stolen from http://reptilia.org/images/Snake_photo_gallery.htm)
I decided to cheat a little bit and dismantle the monstrosity. I took off the bottom bun, patty and cheese slice. I slathered that in ketchup and casually enjoyed my half burger. Yum, delicious. J hates ketchup, by the way. Then I look up and still have a massive double burger to conquer. Ketchup it up nice and dive in. I work around the edge, taking bites, wiping my mouth from the oozey goodness of my chosen condiments and then start running out of edge, so then I dive into the middle. I'm almost 2/3 of the way through and then I hit a wall. I had been trying to eat fairly fast so my stomach wouldn't know what's going on. But it figured it out and told my brain to "STOP!". No stomach! This is for a gift card and a drawing for a $100 Nike giftcard. So I press on. Slowly but surely, one bite at a time.

FINISHED! Phew, sleepy, too full, feels like post-Thanksgiving dinner. I have definitely over-eaten. And of course was encouraged to by everyone's favorite food provider monopoly, Aramark. Fill out my raffle ticket, snap a finished photo and get my Fernow St. Cafe gift card. WTF? The fliers say that you will get a gift card but they cleverly leave out how much the gift card is. I just found out it is for $4. I paid $5.82. So I'm out $1.82 and am waay too full. Great. But I still have a chance at that Nike giftcard. Hopefully I'll get it so I can enjoy the handicrafts of Asia's youth.

Ugh, I need a nap. Or to purge. I'll get my SC snow/cat pictures up this weekend.

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