Tuesday, February 08, 2005


What's in a name?

An Evil Science Chick once commented on the title of my blog. What does it mean? You aren't a lawyer? What gives?

I'll tells ya. It is a quote from the television show "Friends". I watch this show because it's funny and doesn't reflect reality. Or maybe I hope it does reflect reality so that one day I might find my gigantic rent-controlled apartment in the Village. But it is from the few episodes where Ross, angered by his boss eating his sandwich, was on sabbatical, or medical leave of absence, from the museum where he worked. And Joey, the actor who apparently never works, was sitting at home with Ross. Ross decides to help Joey write a script so he gives him a time table and everything. But none of that matters. Chandler and Joey come up with a game called "Fireball" which involves a tennis ball, lots of lighter fluid, and I think that's about it. Ross says "You were supposed to be working on your script, not coming up with Crazy Lawsuit Game."

And I must've seen that episode near the beginning of this weblog, hence the title. And I really don't like lawyers anyway. A friend of mine is a lawyer actually, but he's okay. And my problem is with the entire justice system, and shady soulless lawyers.

Tennessee just introduced a medical marijuana bill into their state senate. Just the fact that these are getting introduced is a step in the right direction. But if you live in TN, go here and contact your state senators.
  • TN & NORML

  • Sorry, but that is one of my political platforms. The other is the environment and conserving our natural resources. Which is why I despise Hummers. For the military, I want no other vehicle. They're beasts and can drive over any terrain and will gladly pay my taxes to keep them in Hummers. But the Hummers I do have a problem with are the ones used locally by soccer moms and other conspicuous consumers.

    Why the fuck do you need a Hummer? Is it the absurd tax break because it weighs 3 tons? Is it because you never know when the Apocalypse is going to hit and you need to get home over the piles of rubble? Why?

    It's a status symbol. Sure. That's why people put huge chrome rims on their SUVs. It's another 10-20 large that you can drop on top of what you just paid for that Denali. I haven't done my research into what the biggest offenders are in the "Low MPG Club" but the Hummer is up there. Does anyone know of a business card type thing that I could carry around and put on these people's windsheild to try and convince them to get rid of their Hummer? Maybe I should contact those eco-terrorists. They would have some good ideas. But I think I would go the not-setting-them-on-fire route.

    But Seth, what about Ferraris and Lamborghinis? They only get single digit number MPG ratings too. Very true and I'm glad you brought that up. I don't have the figures in front of me, but not many Ferraris are sold in the country. Even less Lambos. But Hummers sell like hotcakes. And how many Ferraris do you see driven on the street in one day? I have seen around 5 or 6 lifetime, while I see at least 2 Hummers per week. And most wealthy people only drive their 360 Modenas and Murcielagos on the weekends, in sunny weather for maybe a couple hours. While most Hummer owners, it's their commuter car or the husband's car, so they drive it a considerable amount of time.

    I'm sure by now most of you have seen this thing:

    It's made by International Harvester, maker of industrial trucks and construction equipment. It weighs in at 14,500 lbs. Makes 220 hp and 540 lb.ft. of torque. It can tow small buildings I believe. Gas mileage? We don't need no stinking gas mileage. We're diesel anyway. And of course, celebrities are already lining up around the block to own one of these behemoths.

    And that's why I have a little extra respect for those few celebs who choose to drive the Toyota Prius. It is pretty much designed for stop and go LA traffic with it's regenerative braking and it's gas/electric hybrid engine. I decided a few months back to only drive 4 cylinder engines from now on. Sure it may have a turbocharger on it, but 4 cylinders 4 life.


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